We suppose that's one way to close the funding gap

For a dead woman, Laura Todd is awfully articulate.

“I don’t think people realize how difficult it is to be dead when you’re not,” said Todd, who is very much alive and kicking in Nashville, Tenn., even though the federal government has said otherwise for many years.

Todd’s struggle started eight years ago with a typo in government records. The government has reassured her numerous times that it has cleared up the confusion, but the problems keep coming.

An audit of the Social Security database, which many entities both inside and out of the government rely upon for documenting deaths, has revealed the the Social Security Administration “kills” about 35 people a day. 35 people a day who will spend years trying to “resurrect” themselves in order to get their tax refunds, register their vehicles and regain access to their own bank accounts and finances.

Now, imagine the SSA were a private health insurer and the absolutely huge amounts of deservedly bad PR they would receive from the press and regulatory reaming they would receive from the Feds.

Makes us downright giddy with anticipation for when the Feds will be in charge of our health care.

Sir, got some good news and some bad news, bad news first. That growth we’ve detected is malignant and you will require immediate treatment. The good news is treatment is totally unnecessary as our records show you died just 20 minutes ago.