Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Party of 9

Well, it figures that Sonia Sotomayor will be confirmed to the highest court in the land and since she revealed little of herself during her confirmation hearings, what exactly will she be bringing to the party? Let’s just let the judge speak for herself.

I believe jurisprudence, like cooking, requires many ingredients to make a satisfying meal. In Latina culture we love menudo, the delicious spicy sopa made from simple ingredients. Think of the Constitution as our base ingredient: a bland, tasteless broth of boiled white tripe. Doesn't sound so tempting, does it? Now here's where the fun comes in: all of the cooks gather in the cocina and bring their own special secret ingredients to the mix. Souter salts the pot and Roberts adds Wonder Bread and mayonnaise; Breyer the lox and cream cheese. Thomas drops in fried chicken, and Alito and Scalia spaghetti. Now here comes Kennedy with corned beef and potatoes. Stevens adds the Metamucil. Now we're cooking! Finally, I stir in my special picante blend of Latina legal spices. What started as a boring simple broth is now a delicious crazy justice stew -- that tastes different every time!


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1 comment:

Snarky Basterd said...

What! She likes little boys who sing in a group called Menudo! Wow! That must...like...make her the hippest SCOTUS ever!