Wednesday, February 1, 2012

When commenters attack




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Most likely not one in a series that takes a look at complete take-downs and deconstructions by the commenters of a particular article.




So, what do some folks have to say about a feminist-oriented article from the Washington Post* titled: "The rage behind a woman’s stare" ,to which we reflexively respond, "Great. What did we do this time?"


But first, a taste:


She dabbed her eyes. “There’s a real irony here,” she continued. “Women who grew up after the women’s movement wanted careers, to be strong individuals before partnering up. And we are that independent woman — outside the home. But in our family relationships, that power is lost.”

This woman who had just exulted in racing her son up a mountain looked beaten. “We hate admitting . . . how we just give in and do whatever’s asked of us,” she said. “Until the day we ask, ‘What have I done?’ ”

Sitting across from her, I watched Ilena’s face harden, its sadness replaced by the grim expression — the one I call The Death Look — that I’d seen countless times in the mirror. She spoke.

“I am tired of acquiescing.”

Who isn’t? I wanted to shout. I cited the innumerable times I’d carried more than my share, halting my writing to handle crises, tackle emergencies, or to soothe, instruct, scold or advise the resident males who’d do anything for me but leave me alone.

Surprised by my sudden bitterness, I asked, “Why do we keep doing so much with so little help?” “Because no one else will do it,” Ilena snorted. “Because we can’t live in a house that looks like a cyclone went through it,” I added.

Because we’re the wife, we agreed. The mom. The girl.

Millions of Death-Look-wearing women ask, “What can I do?” yet few embrace the obvious answer: “Stop!” Stop with the cleaning, the arranging, the cheerleading, the shopping, the whole relentless shebang. Some who do stop see their homes’ disarray devolve into a chaos that’s unbearable — for them, not their families.





Commenters, the floor is yours** :




"Ern":

I wonder what a Male Death Look would look like?

Probably a lot like the look on the face of the divorced man who set himself on fire on the courthouse steps a couple of months ago.




"Southern Man" with a more traditional, uh, Southern take on things:

Reminds me of the old farmer who was relaxing in his easy chair while the women and children scurried about cleaning up after dinner. "Why aren't you helping?" he was asked. He scoffed "That's women's work." When asked to elaborate he said "Any work that's in or near the house, not too complicated or physically strenuous, and safe is left for the women and children. Men's work is far from the house, requires mechanical aptitude or physical strength, is dirty and is occasionally dangerous. I do men's work."





This article upset "Ray" and he expresses it in rather haiku form:

hate-pieces like this from the Feminist Medea are propaganda, whose purpose is to rationalize and justify the collective evil that america, through its women, does to boys and men

it's tantamount to whispering in the ears of western women: "See how oppressed you are? See? All us grrls feel that way! So it's RIGHT that we are always raging against men."

thus, the largest prison system in the history of the planet (for MALES) is justified, the vast iniquity in employment, education, law, etc against males is justified

the destruction of fatherhood is justified, collective hatred against masculinity is justified

etc

a very sinister "article" by the despicable washington post, they will answer for their crimes against humanity.





Here's "DADvocate":

The women in the article provide excellent examples (of ego-centrism). It's all about them, their feelings and their experiences along with a near complete lack of understanding of how others feel and experience life.

I know not all women are like this, but I see it in my sisters, ex-wives, and many other women I know. Like any other trait there is an overlap between the genders. Men predominantly seem to expect life to be a struggle. That's just the way it is and you find meaning and gratification from how you meet the challenges in you life and overcoming them.

These women are full of rage at being denied their fantasy life. Rather than develop some insight and take a long hard look at themselves, they rage at the world, especially that world that evil men built. Funny, the more women have become liberated, the more they seem to be angry.





"Mark" combines the inevitable(?), the joys of modern technology and snark:

For men who want to get married: You are going to almost uniformly have to listen to this crap.

My solution has been to live apart from my girlfriend. Lo and behold, keeping my house clean (and I really do keep it clean) is almost an afterthought. I don't have to go out and pound stones on my clothes in the nearest creek to wash them, I have a marvelous invention called a "washing machine" - it takes a few minutes to throw my shit in. I have also stopped dragging my rugs out to be beaten on a line, and I no longer use the churn to create butter.

Have these put-upon housewives heard of these marvelous new inventions? I can still dust and keep a full-time job. Don't know how I do it!!





And after all these gender-based navel-gazing, feminism-bashing and battle of the sexes exercises, we are always still left wondering just one thing: what the hell are we doing with nipples?





* You think we're going into a dubious new series with anything but training wheels?


** The views expressed by the commenters do not necessarily reflect those of management, though there is most likely a reason why it is we selected the ones we did.

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10 comments:

K T Cat said...

Death masks? Really?

Sigh.

Mutnodjmet said...

BwD: I think I will need to expand on your post soon, with one of my own. I am an equity feminist: That is, I believe equal work, equal pay, equal credit. I work in a science-based profession in which I have never had one single hold-back occur because I am a woman. Most men I know, like our SLOBs, are equity feminists, too.

Gender feminism is destructive to everyone human -- male and female alike. In an article I posted recently --

http://templeofmut.wordpress.com/2012/01/26/what-became-of-real-men/

The link that was hit most often -- hundreds of times -- pertains to the lie gender feminists have told that age doesn't impact fertility. This is a sad testament to the fact a lot of career-minded women, believing the feminist line, have held off bearing children until too late. I guess these unborn won't care if the house is clean or not.

Gender Feminism = Death on so many levels that I hardly know where to start.

drozz said...

Know what would make these girls happier? Baking pies. Girls are always happier baking pies.

And cleaning up after me.

K T Cat said...

Mmmmm. Pies.

Dean said...

"I guess these unborn won't care if the house is clean or not."

Priceless.




drozz +1.


KT, don't encourage him.

Foxfier said...

"Your future is full of struggle and anguish. Most of it, self-inflicted"

My dear husband thinks that he keeps things clean-- he simply doesn't see the stuff that I do. Don't know why. Doesn't hurt us because we recognize there are differences between men and women in general.

I do object to SouthernMan's quote on one basis-- I am FAR more mechanically adept than my husband, and I doubt that the guy talking (if it's a genuine quote, instead of mythic) could do ANY home-related technology things. It's more of a dangerous/not dangerous, needs strength/doesn't need strength thing, the goes to the personal strengths.


I can't remember the quote or who shared it, but this kind of sums the deal up:
"Life would be so much better if everyone else would read their scripts."

Foxfier said...

Two more things: the most disappointing thing about my years in the Navy was the way that I was NOT just another sailor, and women who were willing to cash in on their, ah, outhouse had a major advantage; secondly, Mutnodjmet brought this ending line from a cross-stitch when I was little to mind:
So fly away cobwebs,
Dust go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby
and babies don't keep.

SarahB said...

This is why I hate women (there's a reason the SLOB's are mostly men, ahem). Having girlfriends is usually just work.

Ladies, want to be happy and avoid the Death Mask? Pick a nice guy with a good credit score and a job. Then be nice to him, feed him, and have sex with him. After that he won't care if the house is dirty, and he will happily HELP if asked. Yes, you have to actually ask for help...out loud, and that doesn't mean sighs or eye rolls.

Guys, stop picking "passionate" "exciting" or "firey" women. I know you think they are going to be wildcats in bed. But it also means MOODY, bitchy, and self centered.

Road Dawg said...

Wow, so many schools of thought. I like Sarah's answer, but as I get older, the sex requirements turn to be a little affection. I still feel warm and cozy when Mrs. Dawg kisses me on the top of my bald head and places her hands on my neck and shoulders. I just hope she's not fitting me for a rope.

B-Daddy said...

Sarah's answer is best. From an the view of economics and game theory, even when there is a small difference in the value that two partners place on a good, like "house cleanliness," the party that places the higher value on the good will end up paying out of proportion to the difference in perceived value, i.e. doing more of the work. This is because the other party knows that he can get enough of the good that he desires by being a free rider.
Never mind, Sarah said it better.